Rob Schneider

J.D.

Michelle Rodriguez

Harriet

Adrien Brody

Flirty Harry

Lindsay Lohan

Marilyn

Ari Shaffir

The Amazing Racist

Vince Offer

Peeping Tom

Jonathan Spencer

Lt. O'Flanagan / Bob / Sewage Technician / Paparazzi

Anna Akana

Student

Ali Olomi

Taliban Guard

Da'Vone McDonald

Vondell

Jessie T. Usher

Jamal

Noelle Kenney

Patient

Caroline Rich

Cindi

Theo Von

Mountain Climber

Joanna Krupa

Beautiful Girl

Deborah Rombaut

Nurse Jones

Danni Lang

Beautician

Alejandro Patiño

Worker

Calvin Sykes

Murphay

Andrea Lwin

Beautician

Thai Edwards

Swade

Mark Chalant Phifer

Darnell

Ashton Jordann Ruiz

Acquon

Ben Wang

Sweatshop Boss

Paul Kwo

Sweatshop Worker

Hymnson Chan

Student

Rick Chambers

Captain

Chehon Wespi-Tschopp

Black Swan

Isaac Cheung

Sushi Papa

Jia Mae

Sushi Mama (as Jia Perlich)

Paolo Scandarisi

Swollen Pecker

Dante

The Racist Assistant

Joe Roche

Rookie

Ben Begley

Bartender

Tony Vera

Bad Guy

Danni Lang

Beautician #2

Ray Bolton

Patron

Eduardo Ambriz DeColosio

Worker

Diane Kawasaki

Theater Madam

Kimberly Irion

Store Patron

Allen Abrams

White Swan

Marlon Pelayo

White Swan

Nick Lanzisera

White Swan

Dominique Kelley

Pink Swan

Justin de Vera

Pink Swan

Evan Strand

Pink Swan

Eleazar Pagsisihan

Black Swan

Kato Bonner

Hawk

Laura Evans

Hotel Guest (as Laura J. Evans)

Daniel Berson

Hotel Guest

David Weisenberg

Patron

Jennie Taber

Patron

Jennifer DeFilippo

Patron

Harvey J. Alperin

Patron

Gregg Martin

Patron

Marlena Poles

Patron

Josh Cheney

Manager

Justin Dragonas

Cashier

April Gooding

Passerby

Richard Penn

Passerby

Afi Ekulona

Passerby

Zachary James Rukavina

Passerby

Azur-De

Passerby

Rebekah Kochan

Passerby

Chloe Dykstra

Passerby

Nikea Gamby-Turner

Passerby

Rod Maiorano

Officer

Shayla Beesley

Girlfriend

Ethan Stone

U.S. Government Agent

Abraham Justice

Taliban Guard (as Mohamed Ibrahim Elkest)

Ace Gibson

Paparazzi

Michael D. Cohen

Paparazzi

Michael Silva

Paparazzi

James Elden

Paparazzi

Ken Pringle

Paparazzi

Kiersten Hall

Beautiful Girl

Leonard C. Jones

Charles Hughes